SILENT STORMS' SERIES

ANNE'S SILENT STORM

By Noel Omukubi

Anne was afraid of her husband Robert who beat her up like a dog almost every day. Her marriage had become a nightmare, hell on earth. Both Anne and Robert were born again. Infact, Robert served as a leader in the men’s ministry while Anne served in the ladies ministry. They were respected church members and were regarded as the perfect couple. Many looked upto them as mentors for they always looked so happy and perfect together. Anne only told her mum and her best friend that her husband was battering her. Her mum would encourage her to be strong and to endure, after all she (Anne’s mum) had gone through years of violence from her own husband. The violence only stopped when he died. Anne had witnessed her mum take violent beatings from her father. She even wondered how her mother had survived the beatings. She watched her mother became a shell of herself, deteriorate into a weak and fearful woman. Her mother never told a soul about the beatings she got from her husband. In the same way, she expected Anne to keep the matter to herself and accept it as normal. Anne never accepted it as normal and would always tell herself growing up that she would marry a man who would pamper her as a princess.

When Anne was in university, she fell in love with Robert. She was coming out of a Christian Union meeting and met him at the door way. He greeted her and she responded. She assumed that he had been part of the meeting. He was not but Anne did not know this. He was escorting his friend and when he laid his eyes on Anne, he completely forgot about his friend and focussed all his attention on Anne. He was the most charming man you could lay your eyes on. He loved her with a passion and he always told her that he would marry her. He liked to joke and say that Anne was heaven sent to him. Robert loved to talk about Anne’s breath taking beauty.

He loved her dearly and showered her with gifts every so often. He married her in a lavish ceremony and Anne assumed that their marriage would be bliss. How wrong she was. Robert had told her that he was born again and she never questioned it. She loved God dearly and sincerely and she wanted a man who loved God just as she did. To her, Robert was heaven sent. She quickly settled into marriage with the love of her life. Life was good until the first time Robert slapped her. She came home after 7, something she had never done before. She had gone for coffee with a long-time friend and forgot to tell Robert about it. She got home to an angry husband who was not ready to listen to anything she had to say. He accused her of infidelity and when she tried to defend herself, he slapped her so hard that she fell on the floor. She was not sure if it was the slap or the shock out of the fact that her husband could hit her that made her fall. He did not hit her again but he walked away angry. She lay on the same spot she had fallen and cried uncontrollably for hours. Her beloved Robert had slapped her and she could not believe it.

Robert apologised for slapping her and said that he did not know what had come over him. He said that he was jealous and did not want to share her with anyone else. He said that he would rather die than share her affection with another man. Anne told him that the friend she had coffee with was actually a lady, an old time friend that was dear to her. They made up and life went back to normal or so she thought. Anne put the incident out of her mind reasoning that he probably did not mean to hit her. After all, he loved her too much.

After a few weeks, Anne had a late meeting in the office and came home a bit late. Robert was already home and was angrily waiting for her though Anne did not know that he was angry with her. She cheerfully went to say hi to him and received a punch in the face that knocked her out cold. The punch also knocked out two of her teeth. When she came to, she was lying on the floor, bleeding and her husband was nowhere to be found. She wondered if she was dreaming or if indeed her husband had punched her. She was in a lot of pain and when she tried to call out to her husband, he was nowhere to be found. She slowly picked herself up and reached for her phone. She called her husband but the call went unanswered. She called again and again but no response was forthcoming. Anne knew that she was in trouble. The reality of the man she was married to quickly dawned on her. She was re-living her mother’s life. The only difference between Robert and Anne’s father was that Robert was born again or so she thought. Her best friend took her to hospital and she was treated and discharged. Anne told her friend never to tell anyone about the incident. It was to be a secret. 

Robert came back after three days, full of apologies and tears. He said that he did not know what came over him. Anne forgave him and took him back. She had to forgive him, she had to take him back after all he was her husband. She had to let go of the hurt and she had to find a way of living with him. Anne’s marriage became a night mare, her husband beat her up at the slightest provocation. He was such a violent man that she was very afraid of him. She realised that she did not know him well. He had hidden his true identity and only unveiled it once they got married. She was terrified of getting home since any small mistake warranted a beating.

Anne had perfected the art of covering up for her husband. She hid her bruises with makeup. When she was badly injured, she would not show up in church and would lie that she was ministering in another church or she had travelled upcountry. She would wait until she was properly healed to go back to church. She faked a smile in church and would sit very close to her husband pretending that all is well. Truth is she was dying inside ad she lived in fear. Her husband unleashed terror on her and inflicted very serious wounds on her. Her marriage was a nightmare and she did not know how to get out of it, she did not even think that she could. Her husband had threatened to kill her if she ever told anyone about it, but she had also chosen not to ever tell anyone, especially in church about it. It was her secret. The neighbours did not know about it because whenever Robert would beat her, he would turn up the volume of the radio and also warned her that the day their neighbours found out about it would be the last day she would live. He also threatened to commit suicide after killing her.

Anne like many women today is living in a silent storm, a storm that only she can get herself out of. No woman should live in a violent environment in the name of marriage.  Get out before you are killed or permanently maimed.